The Art of Letting Go
A few days ago, I submitted my finished book manuscript to my publisher.
I did it. I wrote my second book.
Well, “finished” is an overstatement, because I don’t think a book is ever finished. And it will still have to undergo the editing process.
It was hard to press send on the email, even though I’m very used to pressing publish.
I was worried that what I had produced wasn’t good enough and I was already anticipating negative reviews on Amazon. Duh.
I knew it was imperfect. I knew I could have made it even better.
But I also knew that my work was done here.
I knew in my heart that this product of my writing was the best I could offer to the world right now at this point in time.
I knew that I gave it my highest excitement during the writing process.
Perfectionism is an illusion anyway. Shipping is more important than obsessing over details and perfecting a creation.
Now it is time to release it, to surrender and trust.
The letting go process without strings attached is an important part in the creative process.
And yet, I struggled to press send, because I am the worst judge of my own creations. And so are we all.
But it’s not our job to do that. Our job is to create and put our creations out into the world. We don’t get to decide if it is good or bad.
It is also not our job to worry about the critics in the world who receive our creations.
We are here to create. That is all.
The problem is that social media f*cked us up. And now our self worth depends on how others receive our work.
The other problem is that our standards of consumption are usually higher than what we can produce.
It’s like we read a book by an established writer like Zadie Smith or Isabelle Allende or Haruki Murakami. And then we compare ours to theirs. That just sets us up for judgement.
I wrote the book as if the words were flowing through me. So I don’t get to judge whether they are good enough or not, they came from a higher source.
I am just the messenger, the transmitter of the message.
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Now, here is the deal though. The not-so-good news.
While having finished the manuscript is opening up all this new time and space to work on my other creative outlets again and create content for you – the universe decided to step in.
It has other plans for me.
It wants me to face some more darkness
It wants me to grow more. It wants me to take responsibility in areas of my life where I haven’t been.
So it threw a major unexpected surprise at me.
One that broke my heart.
One that requires me to surrender and trust and let go even more.
And so I will be spending a lot of time facing my shadows and healing my heart for a while.
And whenever I find the creative space in my heart and mind, I will create and I will press publish.
Because creating is my well of inner peace and fulfilment.
In the meantime, I am grateful to have a great support system and all the healing tools at my disposal here in Bali.
Where in life have you been asked to let go lately?
If you feel it, you can connect with me on Twitter and Instagram, tune into my podcast and check out my videos.